Diaries of 68+1 (Chapter 10)

Alvin goes to Ariana’s house without an invitation the next time. His eyes are tired red and his outfit is untidy. He hugs her without any words and puts his head on her shoulder. “Ariana, I want you to know that I am so tired. I need an extreme rest.” Each time he is sad he says “I need an extreme rest” instead of saying “I extremely need a rest.” Ariana hears him breathe shortly and rapidly. For a moment she caresses his hair and tries to look him in the eye. “Alvin …” Despite being stressed she tries to pacify him with her smile. While Alvin playing with her hair like a child he says:”Just don't ask me, that's it.” Some minutes pass like this. “Now I feel much better. I think I forgot to say hello.” Alvin says. And Ariana responds with a broad smile that can show her white tooth. Alvin takes a perfume out of his pocket and says: “I hope you accept this gift. I am sorry I was really in the blue.” This is like what boys do for their girlfriends in Ariana’s mind. She is not ready for such a thing. But now her heart fully belongs to Alvin and she likes him to be completely hers. So she did not want to thank him just by words. Still, she just says: “Thank you very much!”
“Will you bend your head and close your eyes?”
“Another gift?” He says nothing and she does what he said. Now Alvin kisses her lips softly. “Sorry!” He says and leaves the house. Ariana opens her eyes and touches her lips. She doesn't know if she must enjoy her love gift or become ashamed. She wants to live with this beautiful and nice feeling forever.

Diaries of 68+1 (Chapter 9)

Alvin sends a message to Ariana. “Which door of the city belongs to your house? Which meetinghouse is your meetinghouse?” Alvin believes that he is not created to play in the funfair and maybe that is why he thinks of Ariana in different way. Ariana wants to be loved by someone and be important for him. She likes to talk to someone rather than God. “Alvin is not religious but he is an honest guy.” Ariana thinks. People often try to bypass the faults of the ones they love. Ariana is not sure about what she decides to do. She invites Alvin to her house. She has a little house with cheap furniture and an old television which reminds Alvin of the 80s. Still, Alvin feels surprisingly comfortable there. It feels like that time stops and nothing exists outside. Nothing is waiting for spending time outside the house. But Ariana is a little bit nervous and Alvin feels that. Ariana goes to the kitchen to make a coffee and at the same time control her stress. Alvin turns the television on while sitting on the sofa. But after a while he stands up and goes to the kitchen.
“It gets ready in some minutes.” She says with a gentle smile.
“No! I am not in a hurry to drink the coffee, I am here to see how you make it “
“Like others. Maybe a little bit slower.” Even if she does it like others, she treats different from them in Alvin's mind. Ariana can feel him looking at her. She likes the moment to be continued forever and never stops. Even one more minute can be a gift for her.

Diaries of 68+1 (Chapter 8)

One of the university friends of Alvin is a girl whom he calls Pink. It isn't her real name but he has chosen this name for her. She is a child novelist and has a theory in this field of study. She thinks that children are the best creatures for playing because they believe it as a fact. She has a middle height, her hair color is like the color of wheat and she has a childlike face that one can believe that the soul of childhood is alive inside her. One day while the professor was teaching in the class Pink gave a hand note to Alvin and wanted him to complete it. An uncompleted erotic fiction:
“Judy and Eddy both enter the institute at non official time. They are alone in there. Judy sits on a chair and rolls down her pantyhose up to her knee. She seems to be a little bit nervous. Like someone who wants to finish an undone task. And Eddy even doesn't know what she wants to do …” Even eating is more exiting in forbidden time and area. And it was the only reason that persuades Alvin to write: “Eddy feels itchy on his Pennis.” And then gives the note back to Pink. “Itchy? It's funny.” She murmurs and continues the story like this: “Judy starts to touch herself slowly.” Now it's Alvin's turn. “He began to remove her clothes when he gets arousal because a white girl wearing a blue vest is looking at his black and naked body.” This exchanging erotic writing continues till the end of class.

Diaries of 68+1 (Chapter 7)

A café placed in a chain store is friendly enough but not romantic enough for the meeting in Alvin's mind. So that is a situation which she would accept. “Doesn't Ariana wear socks like other young girls?” Alvin thinks to himself. And when she comes with the same dress as the last time. Alvin looks at her shoes, first. Her old shoes attracts him more than her naked feet. For a moment he finds his way of looking childish. Ariana doesn't need to be checked by him. He belongs to another world and Ariana is not looking for what she doesn't know in an unknown world. Alvin treats like a key maker who tries to open a lock with the help of different keys. So he regrets about what he has told about Jesus Christ. “I don't want to disregard the truth. The beauty of religion lies in its free choice.” “Look Alvin, I am a Catholic and you know that I am going to become a nun but I am not bigoted to Catholicism. So I even like some of Martin Luther's words. You know him, don't you?” 
“Are you a Catholic?”
“Yep, what do you mean?”
“I mean don't you want to marry and become a mother?” The way she thinks is surprising for Alvin. Maybe he thinks that the people who think differently from him look different than her!
“Well, it is good to become a mother or can have a good family but each person has her own way.”
“But Virgin Mary was a mother.”
“She was different. Catholic is a discipline like law, I can't break its rules.”
“Well, I'm not going to defend the right of becoming a mother for a young nun because the beauty of religion lies in its free choice.” But in fact Ariana thinks about it too. But she always tried to accept it without any reason just as a fact. On the other hand, Alvin thinks that a non started story can have different endings. And Ariana is not yet a nun. Alvin moves a step forward and asks her to invite him to her home. “For sure Ariana will feel more secure in her home “ He thought.
In her point of view, this request is as unserious as a cartoon. But she answers like: “I rarely invite a guest to my home.”
“So I hope for a day not to be considered as a guest, especially to you.”
This sentence is meaningful to Ariana.

Diaries of 68+1 (Chapter 6)

Now Alvin has less time than before to protest in Wall Street. He is not lazy but it is difficult for him to make a balance between university and movement. Alvin has never been patient but he wants to be united with patience and time because of Ariana. Some people like to read a nice story. But he prefers to live inside a nice one. Nonetheless he thinks that Ariana is an in-experienced girl who can't refuse all requests. So he calls her and wants to meet her in a friendlier place. They have met four days ago for the last time. In fact she doesn't like to treat like other girls by the way she wants to have such a meeting. But she needs a reasonable reason for having such a meeting with Alvin. His request is friendly but he uses serious sentences. The meaning of this request is unspoken words that he wanted to tell her. He is so serious in stating the subject she doesn't know about that allows her to accept it.

Diaries of 68+1 (Chapter 5)

It is night for both Alvin and Ariana after a common memory at university. Ariana sits on her broken bed where she can look at the little hall of her home lighting up with a white light. “He wants to meet me again “Ariana thinks to herself and smiles for a moment. A new feeling is growing up in her. Although she is a religious person but she is like all her peers. But she empties her mind from this subject very soon. “Don't forget Ariana that you are not like other girls to experience everything.” She says to herself. She prefers to focus on something more important. Maybe her mind is not used to start a love experience. At the moment Alvin is reading a book that he has already read a lot like it in his hand. But he likes to experience a new taste in his life. From the moment Ariana explained her past for Alvin, this tenderness started in him, tenderness to accept responsibilities and discover. Maybe Ariana was the book that Alvin is trying to read. For a person who has got all his life opportunities easily, it is not difficult to be courageous enough to experience new tastes.

Diaries of 68+1 (Chapter 4)

University was a different place for a girl whose experience of social places was limited to school and church. That day Alvin's identity was also different to Ariana. “Someone whose teacher or teachers perhaps are political analysts in CNN, Fox News and … ” She thoughts.  
Alvin preferred one of the university empty classrooms to meet her. Ariana knew about Christine or she just thought that she knew but she founds herself in an unknown academic society. Ariana tried to hide her inner stress with an empty smile. Alvin started the conversation with a question:
“It is told that whoever believes is Jesus Christ will go to Paradise. Is that right?”
“Sure”
“So a member of Wall Street who believes is Jesus Christ will go to Paradise despite his sins, right?”
“We are not God and cannot judge others.”
“I am sorry but I think Jesus Christ is not honest. He tells you not to commit a sin, he wants the poor not to do prostitution but at last he will bless your Yippie father's sins, the one who you didn't even want to talk about, just for he believes in Jesus Christ. Maybe Jesus also seeks power like others.”
It wasn't difficult for her to be patient in such a situation.
“What do you know about my father?” She paused for a moment. Alvin blamed himself for what he said but he remained silent. Ariana continued: “I have lived with my grandma from my childhood; do you want to know why?” Ariana gazing at the door and said: “I am a bitter result of a young couple experience who got mom and dad much more earlier than you can imagine.” Soon after Ariana put her hand on her brow and felt like being humiliated for she reviled all her life secrets easily. “Did you want to know it?!” Alvin was sorry to make her explain everything that she wanted to hide. For a couple of minutes, silence was the only voice. It started raining and it broke the silence. Ariana preferred to connect her life experience to her knowledge about Jesus Christ in order to correct the created picture of herself in Alvin's mind. So she said: “If my parents really believed in Jesus Christ and needed him, they never made that mistake.”
“How can you be this certain? Is it what is written in Bible?”
“Don't tell me what is written in Bible. I know it all.”
Alvin was going far from Ariana as he went near Jesus Christ. At this moment two students entered the classroom. It seemed that a class was going to start. Ariana stood up. “Can we meet again?” He asked. 
“We can be in touch”